I have an interview next week for a bilingual customer service job.

The other language being French.

The other language being a language I hate speaking.

What am I doing?

Nick said it can just be an in between. A job I have for a while before I hear back from the government jobs I've applied to.

But what if I don't get those either? What if I'm stuck speaking French for the next year or two. I don't know if I can do it.

We'll see. I mean, I don't even have it yet.

Ugh. I don't know. I guess it's cool but I hate French. Why am I majoring in it? I like writing it. And I love translating it. It's like a puzzle. I love figuring it out. But I can't stand speaking it.

I think I'm just ready to graduate already. I have three or four more papers to write plus tons of homework and I'm already done done done.

Vicki McMilli-update

She looks and sounds great!

She is at home for the rest of the semester and I don't know who is teaching her classes.

I saw her at the library the other day and stopped very quickly to give her a hug as she was talking to a bunch of librarians. She likes my haircut. She looked fantastic, as usual.

She is undergoing radiation to get rid of any residual tumors.

And she asks that we keep her in our prayers.


I am so happy that she's doing well.

More wedding talk while I'm still not engaged because I know you kids love it

I have been rethinking wearing my mom's dress for imaginary future wedding. I looked at the pictures of my mom and grandmother wearing it for the bajillionth time. It's a nice looking dress but I am beginning to feel a little apprehensive. It is really dated and it appears to be shiny... Maybe it is just not a good photo dress?

I don't really like any other dresses either. Well that isn't true. I fell in love with one when Jess was getting married. I wish I could just buy a bunch and wear them all the time. I love dresses. Maybe I will just wear a dress I really like.

Whenever this boy proposes to me, I am definitely going to try it on and we'll see from there. It might just need updating.

---

My mom said that if I don't find a job right away, Nick and I should get married so I can be on his health insurance. That is the first time she has shown open approval of our relationship. The first time in almost five years.

I'll take what I can get.

---

I received my graduation packet in the mail. I am so ready to be done.

I am nervous about getting a real job though. I mean Ashley is still there and she's been done for almost a year.

I'm still pretty chill. What will happen, will happen whether I freak out or not. I can either be worried about what might happen or I can just let it happen. I'd rather not be worried about it.

---

My brother's birthday is this weekend. He is going to be 16. Oh. Man. I met Nick when we were 16.

Nick and I went to McDonald's on Monday and came home with food poisoning! YAY!

I never had it before so it was awesome.

Missed all my classes and work on Tuesday and am still not feeling 100%. At least I can stand up and not feel nauseated.

Sad part was that I missed classes on Friday because of my death cramps so I haven't been to my Tuesday/Friday classes in a week.

Nick still isn't feeling well.

funny story is below...now this is serious

In other news, McMillan is in the hospital. She was teaching a class the other day and couldn't remember what she was talking about. She kept searching for a word and couldn't think of it. She said everything went out of her head, she couldn't remember anything and she thought she was having a stroke. She collapsed or started shaking or something and the nursing students helped her out and called Nurse Kim. She's been in the hospital since then. They took an MRI and there was a teardrop shape that was floating on her brain. They think she has a brain tumor but won't know for sure until the test results come back. Cindy and Pat went to see her and said she wasn't wearing a hospital gown, she was just wearing her normal clothes. How very McMillan.

I hope she's okay.

Tats I am currently wanting, location of said tattoos, their commemorative occasion and how long my lust has been brewing

I was bored in Philosophy so I decided to make this list. Quotes denote the actual word or phrase, descriptions accompany pictures/designs.



1. "Orpheus", behind my ear (left? right?) upon my engagement. Lust for this one has been brewing for over two years. Nick doesn't like tattoos (he thinks they're stupid) but I've talked to him about the ones I want and I think (?) he's okay with it. He still thinks they are stupid.

2. Infinite heart (infinity sign with heart on one loop), on my right wrist (in white?) whenever I am with Laura and we are drunks. Lust for this one has been brewing for four to five months.

3. "Music is my aeroplane", unknown location, unknown commemorative event. Lust for this one has only been brewing for a month or so making it the second sketchiest.

4. "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few. Or the one.", unknown location, upon birth of first child. Lust has only been brewing for two hours making this one the one I'll probably nix. Also people probably already have it so I will need to google the heck out of it when I get home.

5. "143", below the infinite heart on my right wrist, upon the birth of my first child. Totally pretentious awesomeness? "CXLIII". Did you know google will do Roman numeral translation like it does math equations? It's great. Lust has been brewing for...20 minutes?



This is here so I can reference it, talk it over with you kids and refer to it when brewing more ideas.

Second week of classes

I hate the first couple weeks of every semester. The freshmen get to their classes a half an hour early and take up all the seats so I have to sit in the front of class. In order to get to class a half an hour early, they need to park very early. So by the time I get to Fulton lot, there aren't any spots open.

Plus, the parking lot isn't plowed and these freshman apparently have no spatial skills. The parking lot is a mess. Cars are all over the place, making the lane wide enough for one car to drive through at a time. Especially at the back of the parking lot.

Thank goodness they haven't discovered the flood lot yet. There were six cars parked there, including mine. I'm definitely clinging to the hope that they will never find it. I don't know where I'm going to park once it rains. They better have gotten their act together by then.


This is apparently the stupidest group of freshmen we've ever had. They don't know how to schedule classes or listen when you answer their questions. And I don't know if I've become a genius overnight, if I'm good at reading comprehension or if these four years have really beefed up my school skills, but these kids in my English class ALL OF MY CLASSES must be mentally disabled. We read a short story for my English class that was narrated by a nameless boy and girl. It wasn't even hard to tell them apart because the girl's text was bold and not capitalized. Half the kids thought the girl was telling the entire story and the bold parts were flashbacks. And this one girl couldn't believe that the boy and girl would use the same phrases. Even though they were lovers. And they weren't necessarily writing at the same moment. That was when the story was unbelievable to her. And she almost started crying when she was telling all of us this...which was weird.

In my philosophy class, we are only reading nine chapters of our first book. These nine chapters don't need to be read all at once but gradually during the upcoming weeks. I seriously heard multiple people say they couldn't read 200 pages at a time and they were thankful we were reading it slowly. TWO HUNDRED PAGES. HOW THE HELL DID YOU PEOPLE GET THROUGH HIGH SCHOOL/LIFE? OMFG.

oh btw...my schedule

Since Nick and Oliver work together now, they have the car Tuesdays through Saturdays. I get to drive myself on Monday and Katti drops me off on the other days.


Monday
Intro to Fiction 10:50-12:05...I needed the credits. Chesley is awesome.

I drive home to eat lunch or whatever. I took a nap yesterday with Nick. It was the best day ever.

Desktop Publishing 3:05-4:20...I needed the credit.


Tuesday
Intro to Philosophy 10:50-12:05...my one required class for the semester. THE ONLY ONE. All we have are four essays. No tests. So. Excited. Also, attractive 35 year old = win.

Lunch or whatever. At school because Katti drives me.

French Translation Concepts 1:40-2:55...we didn't have this class today because he's still in France but three of us didn't know and came to class only to sit around for fifteen minutes. I don't know how it will be but Pichot assured me that quite a bit of English will be spoken.

Work from 3 until 5.


Wednesday
I work from noon to 5. Katti drives me.


Thursday
Intro to Fiction 10:50-12:05...again.

Work at 1 until 4 because I don't have the car.

Database 4:30-5:45...because I need the credits and it sounded interesting.


Friday
Intro to Philosophy 10:50-12:05...again.

Nom nom nom.

French Translation Concepts 1:40-2:55...again.

Work from 3 to 4:30. I think. That sounds silly now. I will check. Later.




So I am super excited for this semester because it will be so easy but I'm kind of nervous about it because I am already getting the urge to skip.


P.S. I got rainboots for Christmas and they cheer me up.

LIFE UPDATE, STAT!

Exam week
I had two exams. They were easy. I got a C+ in my art class and cried. I found out that my favorite new kid at work got fired and cried. Bieneman said we could turn in our final projects on Friday but the weather was bad and our internet was out so I didn't. I emailed him on December 23rd to let him know it was coming. I looked at my grade and saw it was an F and emailed him apologizing on its tardiness.

CHRISTMAS
The Eve: Nick worked until 4:30 so we weren't able to leave until he got home. Then, me being awesome, I had to wrap all the presents with pirate and wedding wrapping paper. Or I would have if I didn't drag Katti to Meijer with me to grab the first wrapping paper I saw. I quickly wrapped all the things I had made in my art class for my family and gathered up the roomies. Around 6 we finally started up to my parents' house where we exchanged family gifts and Nick got money then we went up to Nick's parents' house and pigged out. We spent the night there and I barely slept because I always get so excited for Christmas.

I'm boring myself.

I got awesome PJs from my dad and everyone loved them. Christmas Day was weird because I'm usually there to see everyone open their presents but this was the first year I didn't.

I got ice skates from my parents and cried.

BREAK
I played WoW with Katti and Oliver and only worked last week. I found out that Bieneman actually meant to give me an incomplete and put in the wrong date so he's okay that I'm handing it in super late. I still have to do it and I'm lazy but that's my project for this week.

Oliver started at Comcast on the 6th. Which is cool because now they have money and they will maybe pay bills for the third time since we've lived together.

I also found out that the book I requested through interlibrary loan last semester finally came in. So I can start my French paper before the incomplete deadline and get both my incompletes done early.

If I'm not lazy.

Nick got me WiiFit. Did not cry but felt guilty.

So that's what you've been missing.

I am already excited for this semester to be over and it's only the first week.

Graduation, here I come!

P.S. Ben and his stupid girlfriend got engaged. Everyone hates her and the two of them as a couple. They have not been together a year. They are so poor, both their parents are helping to pay their bills and rent. Ben did not tell us they were engaged, facebook did. Katti railed on Ben for not telling us. He said he didn't know facebook told everyone and he was planning on telling us. He suggested we all get together to celebrate some weekend. Katti's reply: "Oliver works on Saturday." We (Katti, Oliver, Nick and I) agreed that we would never celebrate their engagement because we are not happy for them. And that was that.

I am sick and tired of polisci kids thinking that because they are a polisci major they somehow are more worldly and knowledgeable than I am. That they are somehow better than I am.

And this not voting shit? WHAT THE FUCK.

I don't care if your hippie ideals don't fit with the world you live in. You live here. I'm sorry your dreams are being crushed but this is the real world.

For fuck's sake, you're a woman! I hate to pull the starving children in China routine but you are damn lucky you even have this opportunity. I don't care if you think your vote is supporting some corrupt system. If your vote doesn't count, as you say it doesn't, how could it support anything.

Sitting at home not voting and thinking about how the world could be better does nothing. I'm not saying voting will but at that point, doing anything will.

The world won't change in a day. It won't change with your increasing polisci knowledge, it won't change with my vote. But maybe the person I vote for will change something small.

Even if that doesn't happen, I can do something. You can do something. Wars aren't won as wars, they are won as battles. My vote changes something. In that decision, universes split off.

I just don't understand how someone as intelligent as you are can be so stupid.

"Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy."

A few things

First, I bought this book over the weekend. The first 80 pages are full of primers on all the tools and techniques you use for the projects. Needless to say, I was a bit overwhelmed.

I decided to ignore everything except what I needed for the first project and I feel a lot better about the book now. At the beginning, I said I was going to make everything in the book but I really didn't think I'd actually make anything.

So I got to it and I decided to make the first project in the book, figuring it would be the easiest.

It's an LED bracelet. I bought what I could for it today, including online purchases. It was funny being in Home Depot because no one who wanted to help us had any idea what or where the stuff I needed was. It's was like an adventure. Only it was really annoying.

Secondly, will.i.am is going to be at AQ this Sunday at 11. Who is pumped? I am pumped.

Thirdly, I would like to go see Cloud Cult sometime this fall. Rumor has it, this is their last tour and their last album before an indefinite hiatus. Luckily (for me), almost all the upcoming tour dates are near your new homes. They will be in DC on November 10, Boston on November 13, Bethlehem, PA on November 14 and Menominee, WI on November 17. I threw the WI one in there because Nick's aunt and uncle live in WI somewhere. I don't know which one I'm going to choose yet but I'm going to talk it over with Nick and look at trains so let me know if any dates work out for you two.

I also am planning a Lansing/Ann Arbor trip sometime soon, so steel yourself, Toi. If this trip actually goes through, I'll be traveling with Katti, Oliver and maybe a few of our friends. Katti and Oliver have a friend who lives in Lansing so we could all crash with him.

! الحمد لله

I am so sorry that I haven't updated lately but things have been crazy. On Mondays and Thursdays, I have class from 9am - 7pm with 5 minutes between classes and work crammed in there too. Otherwise, I have one or two classes.

Here's the rundown:

Mondays/Thursdays
I have Cartography at 9. This class is awesome because I've always wanted to be a useless cartographer and it's taught by Bieneman. Did I ever tell you I had his wife in elementary school? She was my fourth grade teacher. Her mother passed away this week.

At 10:50, I go to work until 1:25.

Don't even get me started on these new kids. They deserve their own post.

At 1:40, I have French Film and Lit. It's only the second week of school and I already am just reading the SparkNotes. The class would be so much less painful with you girls but I'm surviving okay with...the one girl whose name I still don't know after four years and some other girl.

Five minutes after the end of French class, I have Ceramics. It's really just a class to help me calm down but I've already broken two pots and found two very not artistic buddies. I am so not artsy.

Five minutes after the end of feeling dumb, I have Arabic. Which is, quite frankly, awesome. It is difficult but a ton of fun. I feel like such a genius when I get a word right or when I understand what's going on. Also: heritage! I hope I get to talk to my mom's relatives before the kick the bucket because now I know my blood languages (as my mom calls it).

Tuesdays/Fridays
I have a confession to make. Because I couldn't afford the textbook and he stressed homework so much, I dropped my history class. So now I have to take it next semester.

In other news, at 10:50, I have Tai Chi. Which is reaching Folk and Square Dance in awesomeness. The prof learned Tai Chi directly from some famous family who created a form of Tai Chi. He is a hoot. I have a thousand stories from him. He fell off a curb and landed on cement about a year ago and had trouble walking again. His hip hurt when he walked so he couldn't walk across the room until he tried doing Tai Chi. When he walked by doing his Tai Chi moves, his hip didn't hurt any more. Since he is injured, his wife does most of the demonstrations. She also helps him remember how old he is when he adds thirteen years to his age. Both of them are pretty old, 60s and 70s, but they are hilarious. He calls himself Monk and his wife Natalie Teager. Most of the class is taken up by his stories.

On Tuesdays, I have Arabic at 6 (work before that (10:50 to 5) but I have Arabic only Mondays through Thursdays so I just have Tai Chi and work on Fridays.

On Wednesdays, I am not working for the first time in my life. So all I have is Arabic at 6. I sleep, I read, I do homework, I relax.


Overall, this semester is awesome but very stressful. I have a lot of work ahead of me.

So tomorrow is the first day of my last year in college.

And that is terribly depressing.

I am trying very hard to just breathe. I've tried every meditation exercise from my Nutrition, Exercise and Stress class (best. class. ever. I still, obviously, use the meditation techniques we did every day in that class.) but lately I have been returning to my France mantra.

It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. I'm okay. It's okay.

I've been crying over every little thing. Which, you know, would be fine except I had finally gotten over my uber-sensitive crying phase.

Dude. Depressing emo blog man. I shall stop now and go eat something before winding down and going to bed.

I love you dudes.

We are finally out of the old apartment and the second I walked out the door (after cleaning for three days, scrubbing and smelling icky chemicals for at least two hours) a gigantic weight was lifted off my shoulders.

Work has been hella crazy lately. Ashley and I are working on this giant project and maybe have an eighth of it done between the both of us. I am supposed to be working for financial aid sometime too but I feel bad abandoning Ashley when it's so crazy. And I would have to go and do it up in admissions. Which is always awkward because I feel like an outsider.

Anyway life is pretty good. Katti says I can ride her bike to work. I bought a helmet this weekend and all I need now is a bike lock. I'm pretty pumped.

I started thinking about this upcoming semester and got really sad so I don't want to think about it until August 25. Thank you.

Trapped in the Closet

The first time I watched Trapped in the Closet was three years ago with Micah at AQ. It must have been after some SAC thing. He dragged a bunch of us over to St Joe's and we crowded around someone's laptop, watching the first 11 chapters (if there were more back then, we would have been all over it).

Yesterday, on a whim, I decided to google it and found all TWENTY-TWO CHAPTERS up on ifc.com. Now, I have not watched them all yet but I thought it would be a great way to kick of my liveblog.

Because, really, is there anything better out there?