Me: Hey, I wanna play this game with my 360 controller.
Windows: Oh okay.
Me: This game says it's the coolest with the controller.
Windows: Mmhmm.
Me: It says it does rumble.
Windows: Yes.
Me: So, I'm gonna plug it in...and you should...see it right?
Windows: Sure.
Me: Okay, it's there.
Windows: I'm not seeing it.
Me: Well, it's there.
Windows: Still not seeing it.
Me: Let me unplug it and I'll put it back in.
Windows: Uh no. Nothing.
Me: Um. So. Do you need a driver or something for this?
Windows: I'm not quite sure.
Me: Can you check?
Windows: No.
Me: Well, I'm going to ask Google. He always knows.
Windows: I can wait.
Me: He says you do.
Windows: Okay.
Me: I went to your website and you just wanted me to buy a controller.
Windows: Well, yeah. You need one to play the game.
Me: Yeah, well. I have one right here. Remember? It's plugged in.
Windows: Oh. Yeah. I can't see it though.
Me: Right.
Windows: Right.
Me: So, I'm going to go ask Google again. Maybe he knows a better place.
Windows: Okay.
Me: He told me to go to your website again.
Windows: Yeah, it's probably there.
Me: Well, the link they sent me to? It doesn't work.
Windows: Huh.
Me: So. I'm going to look around a little.
Windows: Okay.
Me: Why isn't it on the page with the controller? You know. Under related topics or links or whatever.
Windows: Shrug.
Me: Huh.
Windows: ...
Me: Oh well I'm going to go to this product download link.
Windows: Mmhmm.
Me: Why do you need to know what I'm downloading it for? I told you on that other page.
Windows: I forgot.
Me: ...
Windows: I can't see it. I forgot.
Me: ...
Windows: ...
Me: Okay, well it's downloading.
Windows: What?
Me: A driver or something. I don't know. It's downloading.
Windows: Okay.
Me: Why is it going to take five minutes?
Windows: I don't know.
Me: Okay.
Windows: ...
Me: Well, it's done.
Windows: Okay.
Me: So, it's installing.
Windows: Okay.
Me: You know, my OS came out after the 360.
Windows: Yeah.
Me: So why didn't you just include the driver with the OS?
Windows: I don't know.
Me: I have a lot of useless stuff from you already. Why didn't you just include it?
Windows: I don't know.
Me: Okay it's done.
Windows: Okay.
Me: Why the hell do you always want me to restart? The light is lit up. Why do I have to restart?
Windows: I don't know.
Me: Bill Gates doesn't even know why I have to restart.
Windows: Well...we don't talk anymore.
Me: Huh. Well, I'm not restarting.
Windows: Okay.
Me: I'm going to go play my game now.
Windows: We'll see...
Me: Wait.
Windows: What?
Me: Why's the program still there?
Windows: Which one?
Me: The one I installed the driver with.
Windows: I don't know.
Me: Why couldn't you just delete it after it installed?
Windows: I don't know.
Me: And what's this Windows Update thing?
Windows: Hm?
Me: You just installed the driver and already you need to fix it.
Windows: Well... This is an update just for you.
Me: You couldn't just put the latest version on your website?
Windows: No.
Me: You asked me what OS I was using.
Windows: Yes. Yes I did.
Me: So. You could have just the latest one for my OS there. On that special page. For me.
Windows: Yeah.
Me: Huh.
Windows: Yeah.
Me: You want me to restart again.
Windows: Yeah.
Me: Fine.
Windows: See you later.
Me: Whatever.
Friday, December 12, 2008
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2 comments:
I love it! I almost was missing Windows the other day but not anymore.
Ugh. I hear ya.
I've been trying for 3 months to get Windows to tell me how to fix the links in the start menu (when I click them, they won't open the program; I have to actually go into the all programs file and open the program there.) I'm beginning to lose hope that it can be fixed and I'm beginning to think that Windows is run by monkeys. The monkeys that were rejected by other monkeys as too stupid to survive in the jungle.
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